I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I need to stop coming to work sober
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize