Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.