I can text with my tongue
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Im part way to drunk.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
