Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
21 Guys Share Their Insane Stripper Stories
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
27 Reasons Why Men Need To Moan More During Sex
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.