Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
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