I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Randomize