Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.