its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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