Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
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