We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
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