According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
The dick lei will go down in squad history
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
