It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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