Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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