My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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