similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
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I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
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This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
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