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you're like a bully in the Christmas story
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
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