stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.