i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
