Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
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Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
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He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.