u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize