Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize