I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
