Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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