Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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