i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?