I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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