do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Let's paint friendship bongs
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
