She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
