oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires