just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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