I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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