i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it