Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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