Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
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