im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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