the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
