If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize