summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Randomize