i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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