It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I have tasted many bathrooms
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
