So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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