i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize