it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
