i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
The power of my boobs compel you
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
