All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
