Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
