Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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