Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
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I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
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You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
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