Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
