sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Can I color on your dick again?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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